Post Covid-19 Pakistan
April 5, 2020
Fearvid-19, the new strain
April 23, 2020

FORVID-20

Forvid-20 is an imaginary virus, a poor relative of its flamboyant and famous forerunner, the Covid-19. The two operate in tandem. One overtly with symptoms like fever, coughing and breathing difficulty, the other covertly causing permanent neurological changes. While one can be helped by social isolation and frequent hand washing, the other on the contrary, flourishes in such situations. One goes after the aged and the infirm, the other goes after the rich and the unthinking. One is essentially egalitarian in character while the other often victimizes the educated, idle, retired and the gullible.

So what exactly is Forvid-20. It is both an insidious partner in crime and a by-product of Covid-19. Once Covid has locked down a locality, Forvid-20 takes over. Patients begin showing symptoms of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder – a mental disorder in which a person feels the need to perform certain routines repeatedly. Simultaneously it induces Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) where a patient rapidly fluctuates between Facebook, Instagram and WhatsApp, without focusing on any of them.

Forvid-20, begins to release its harmful chemicals as soon as a person hears a notification sound or begins glancing at the phone’s WhatsAPP messages. On seeing ‘forwarded’ written at the top of a post, the infected person, gets into a state of mindless frenzy and begins to forward the post regardless of the nature of its content . It could be a video, TV interview, Ted talk, recipe, joke, religious sermon or anything that might have happened to an old man in Borneo. It just has to be anything already forwarded by another infected patient. The compulsion is so ever whelming that it makes the patient froth and sweat with anxiety, stop thinking and vigorously press buttons till every forwarded post has been further forwarded to numerous recipients. Thus Forvid-20 becomes the first disease in history where the infection can be transmitted to people thousands of miles away.

While the Covid-19 has a 14 day cycle, the Forvid-20 fever will become a permanent part of a patient’s personality. Forvid-20 patients very soon get addicted to the compulsive mindless, non-value adding clerical, finger pressing motions. They begin to forward a forward much before they have read or understood it. Every Forvid-20 infected ‘WhatsAppian’ is likely to infect at least 54 more individuals by forwarding the unknown, unchecked and unverified forwarded virus.
Note: Research shows that Forvid-20 attacks neurons and could permanently damage your views, thinking, discretion and creativity in the process.

Naeem Sadiq